Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Prodigal Piggy

That's how writing mi current post feels.
Having parked mi blog for over a year, writing on it again is a weird feeling. I'll let go of the Pig Latin that always graced every sentence on this blog. Why? Well, this blog continued to age even in my absence, though I left it on its own for so long. I've treated blogging just as inconsistently as I've treated my own dreams. Lord. Now, the blog's older and wiser, and so is the BlogPiggy. A year brings many experiences: some good--some difficult to get over. When I first started blogging, I really thought blogging came naturally to me--just dive right in! I thought I took to it like a fish to water--and what kinda crap is that analogy anyway? Fish don't take to water--water is all they'll ever know until they die--it's not like every fish starts off warming a bench at some Kinder-Prep, and then gets let go into the wild--into the ocean--at a certain age (maybe right before GSAT/Common Entrance), when the world celebrates how quickly every fish takes to its secondary environment. Reality check: waterless environments have never existed for living fish. ANYWAY, the point is, I blogged in all the ways a person shouldn't blog: I discussed my dearest prenatal plans in such detail that in any negative eventuality my disappointment could've only been as painfully detailed, had my entries continued as fervently as they'd started. On the blog, I harshly criticized what I perceived as my previous employers' unfairness, etc.. I wrote about a few of my relatives' private situations (commiserating, I thought), and refused to remove the posts, even when they became aware of it and objected. (Now, I realize that wasn't about me learning to assert myself to some relatives. That's me still being wrong, but when it done a'ready, it done a'ready.) I posted mi pic on the blog, causing an awkward situation. I then cast the blog away from me, not realizing that (for impulsive me) a blog is a boomerang--not even realizing that even then it's a boomerang that really means a lot to me. It 's a great way to celebrate what I've always appreciated, e.g., J'can poetry, like I initially planned to feature on it. Now, Miss Lou's gone, and the urge to Blog her a goodbye poem--led me to write on mi blog again--to be the stranger knocking maybe too softly on the door of his own house (which he up and left so long ago). Reading the blogs linked to mine feels like navigating an old neighborhood, and the other blogs linked to them are like new development (houses, centres, etc.) on once-familiar roads. I don't delude myself anymore that blogging comes naturally to me, and I don't delude myself that I'll "reopen" this blog and start blogging mi arse off again, but this blog has to have a post that thanks everyone who ever visited it and took the time and energy to care what Piggy felt or did at the time of any posting. Piggy's blog must also apologize for retreating into itself in rougher times. Thanks, everyone. Sorry I up and disappeared. I never said it then, but I'll always appreciate all of you for allowing me to get to know you and share your life for a while and for your getting to know me and sharing my life for a while--actually, despite my seemingly inexplicable absence, truth is, I've never felt the urge to take any of that for granted, or any of you for granted. Here's a proper goodbye: Best regards, everyone--you've all always been kind to a naive, bright-eyed, sometimes selfish, sometimes sometime-ish, hypersensitive, but always-affectionate-in-her-regard-of-you Piggy. (MB, Dr D, Scratchie, etc., welcomed me so warmly back then, that I'm 4ever glad ah ever started bloggin'.) Cheers and Ciao! I'm smiling. Why? I'm honourin' mi brief sojourn in interactive blogdom, but this blog's been closed so long that maybe nobody will ever read this post, and yet it still feels good to have written what's in mi heart. Kisses, all! Life, Love, and Happiness!!

9 comments:

Abeni said...

Welcome back.I missed my big sister

Mad Bull said...

This post is nice too... eloquent, even. Well, if you must leave us, its nice of you to say goodbye. All the best, Piggy, if you decide that you really are leaving.

Jdid said...

so is this goodbye again?

I hear you loud and clear in this post. Sometimes I feel the urge to just bust out and say certain things on my blog but I find that restraint is a great part of blogging cause while you want to tell it all and tell it truthfully this just isnt the forum for that. So you do what you can and recognize the constraints of this internet blogging medium.

Melody said...

Sistas 4ever, Kami, blog or noh blog. U know a'ready.
MB & Jdid, much luv. De urge to "bust out and say certain things" is exactly why bloggin' isn't really 4 de impetuous and/or thin-skinned. And me bein' me . . .

Dr. D. said...

Welcome back! if you had come to our sites and left some comments, then we would have been back here long ago. Anyway, now that we know.... let's see some more of you. Cheers.

Melody said...

Cheers, Doc! Havin' been away 4 so long brings a somewhat tentative approach but mi sincerely appreciate how yu welcome back de Piggy. Kisses!

CoolDestiny said...

It is nice to see you back, even if it's just to say goodbye and the other posts since this one ... :)

Yamfoot said...

well look here now.....I JUST updated my blog links, and deleted you cause I say you not posting again!

When i get the energy I will put it back on.

welcome back.

Melody said...

Hi, CD, U hit it 'pon de head: mi blog a proper goodbye (bittersweet melancholy et al!), and people that ah thought figgat 'bout mi actually saw it immediately & welcome mi back! So 'ere I ham:)!
Yammie, U & de Piggy were synchronized in a divinely 'asynchronous' way! Our mutual timing's exquisitely uncanny, so our blogs can't help but be linked. De long & short ov it: Put it back on, e-yer. Nuff respect.